Thursday, July 24, 2008

Color Me Blood Red


On Friday July 11th 2008, my movie partner in crime, Rick Popko and I premiered our latest disgusting exploitation opus: "RetarDEAD" at The Victoria Theatre in San Francisco. This gore-soaked zombie flick is actually the sequel to the equally revolting "Monsturd" which premiered at the Victoria in June of 2002. Yes...it actually took six years to make a sequel to movie about a monster made of shit. A sequel which involves special ed students, a serial sex offender, a mayor with a big breast fetish and an a LSD ring being operated in an elementary school. When singing for our supper during the Q&A session after the movie, we were asked such questions as "What did you make the vomit out of?" and "How many gallons of blood did you go through for the movie?"..or the more probing, "What kind of sick bastards are you?"

In homage to our exploitation forefathers, the team of Herschell Gordon Lewis and David F. Friedman, we handed out air sick bags adorned with the movie's poster art. Both Mr. Lewis and Mr. Friedman were kind enough to be minimally involved with the flick, Herschell providing the opening narration and Dave appearing briefly in an on-screen cameo. Thus we become a footnote in the filmographies of two exploitation legends. The two men who presented the world, for better or worse, with the first full-fledged, in-your-face, gore film: "Blood Feast" (1963). Being a "sick bastard", I tend to romanticize the golden age of exploitation and hope that the lineage of showmanship continues when two douche bags like Rick and myself can shoot a low budget gore epic, give it an eyebrow raising, slightly off-color title and get that thing four-walled, tub thumped and up on theatre marquee for all to see. You can call us "hacks" and "Schlockmeisters" but you can't deny our dedication. Since we began making features, the pair of us have been called every name you could think of for the type of subject matter we choose to exploit and this didn't come as any surprise to either of us. You can't make a movie titled, "Monsturd" without SOMEONE calling you an asshole...no matter how hard you tried to deliver an entertaining, if not entirely tasteful motion picture. Call us anything but "lazy"....because I can assure you no matter what you want to call me, chances are I've been called it before...and not just for making these movies...but I challenge any "Armchair Spielberg" out there who thinks they can do better to top getting a movie with "turd" in the title into Blockbuster Video. Different strokes for different folks as they say. Some people are simply more entertained by Troma's "Citizen Toxie" than Welles' "Citizen Kane". So sometimes I prefer John Waters over John Houston...sue me.