Sanguinary Teeth Horrific Black Pattern Halloween Mask

This little baby is the "Sanguinary Teeth Horrific Black Pattern Halloween Mask" and features or is capable of the following :

1.) "The teeth of Horrific Halloween Mask is bleeding"

2.) "An unmerciful skull luminous Halloween Mask with sharp teeth scare people very much"

3.) "With some strange pattern on face and forehead, it is terrible"

Pink Lousy Big Mouth Rubber Little Hair Halloween Mask!

Wow, the description for this weird-looking thing is WAAAAAYYY Out there. According to the website, the traits of this "Pink Lousy Big Mouth Rubber Little Hair Halloween Mask" include the following :

1.) "Pink Halloween Mask with no two much decoration but is terrible"

2.) "this Lousy Halloween Mask is good gift to coming Halloween"

3.) "You can use it to scare people suddenly deep in the night and it can almost take other's souls away" (????)

4.) "A devil appear when you wear this Little Hair Halloween Mask" (?!)

Regular Teeth Satanic Gruesome Skull Hadean Mask

Permit me to introduce the "Regular Teeth Satanic Gruesome Skull Hadean Mask for Halloween".

this mask is quite frightening as you will notice when reading the following excerpts from its description :

1.) "The face of Hadean Halloween Mask is horrible skull shape with two lines teeth"

2.) "With black cloth cover SATANIC HALLOWEEN MASK cover you head perfect"

3.) "Hallpween is coming, REGULAR TEETH HALLOWEEN MASK is a hot topic on that night"

4.)"It is suit to adult"

5.) "GRUESOME HALLOWEEN MASK can be use in deep night to scare people"

all self-explanatory really. (it's actually misspelled "Teeeth" on the site...but I did keep "Hallpween"...I have no clue what "Hadean" means...maybe someone was trying to spell, "Hades"?)

Gruesome Halloween Mask Green Face

I have stumbled upon a comedy goldmine with this shitty website that sells these idiotic masks. Bask in the glory of this " Long Hair and Beard Gruesome Halloween Mask Green Face" and its wonderful description which boasts :

1.) "Perfect wearing this LONG HAIR MASK in All Saint's Day"

2.) "This mask no any harm for you skin" (always a plus!)

3.) "Hair stands on end when you see this GRUESOME HALLOWEEN MASK at the first sight."

4.) "So horrible and gruesome, suitable for the adult people"

5.) "Making much fun with this GREEN FACE MASK, horribed(?) people image see the ghost."

6.) "Inside your face in the mask, you never feel obturation, comfortable of it" (????)

Wow! That is quite a mask!

Evil Spider Horrible Satanic Skull Halloween Mask

According to the description, this "Evil Spider Horrible Satanic Skull Halloween Mask" offers the following perks :

1.) "The skull makes you terrible when the night and it makes you crazy because it is rather scary"

2.) "It looks as if to eat other people up and it is horrible"

3.) "The HORRIBLE MASK is really horrible and scary as if it's ready to attack"

4.) "Unique design to scare everyone with its evil and ghastly appearance"

5.) "This skull Halloween mask's full-head size fits all most of adult comfortably"

What more could one want from a Halloween mask?

Hell Evil Madness Zombie Halloween Mask Cape Props(???)

Nothing quite beats a shitty Halloween mask for laughs...EXCEPT one with a shitty cape sewn to it like a bonnet! This baby is eleven million shades of awesome! Ladies and gentlemen, without further adieu, I present to you the "Hell Evil Madness Zombie Mask Cape Props". (????). Aside from the fact that this shitty Dracula mask seems to be actually sewn into the equally-crappy cape, it has so much more to offer the potential Halloween costume buyer as website boasts:

"100% BRAND NEW Halloween mask & in excellent condition, never used before!
This mask with rubber strap is made from high quality durable silicone, very clean and never odor, it can show its horrible outline in dark light! its full-head size fits all most of adult comfortably!
Come with cape, which was made of chiffon cloth! it measures more than 1m long;
Unique design to scare everyone with its evil and spooky appearance, it seems that Day of Satan governing the world came back again!
Excellent collectible scary mask for Halloween or decorating "haunted" house best! Great for trick-or-treating or any Halloween party!
Weight: 210g"

Now who in their right mind wouldn't purchase such a fantastic Halloween ensemble? And don't forget "it seems that Day of Satan governing the world came back again" (?????) and "very clean and never odor."

Rubber Some Hair With Spinous Nose? Really?

Okay I think something is being lost in translation on this shitty Halloween mask website. This little baby is called the "Rubber Some Hair With Spinous Nose Guileful Halloween Mask". Come again?

Adult Big Sex Mouth With Hair

There's nothing quite as awe-inspiring or hilarious to me as a really shitty Halloween mask. Mexico produces some of the very worst....and I think this little baby may have crept over the border with a few of its retarded-looking brethren. Ladies and gentleman, I give you the "Adult Big Sex Mouth Halloween Mask With Hair" (?????). That is what this monstrosity is called on the website I found it on. What the fuck does that even mean? Adult Big Sex Mouth Halloween Mask with Hair? This looks like someone who's been run over several times with an automobile.