These are my new imaginary friends, Ronald "Peppermint Schnapps" Saunders and Mrs. Alma Whipple of 45 Glenview Terrace West. They reside inside of my mind and keep me entertained during those excruciatingly-long and admittedly-boring sermons that I preach at my new church, The Church of The Later Day Christ Chainsaw Massacre, Part VI : The Final Conflict : Episode I. Goddamn I can drone on and on. "God this", "Jesus that" and blah blah blah. It's not like I believe any of that shit...I just do it for the collection money to keep me in hoes and Country Club Malt liquor.
Ronald is quite the prankster and knows a thousand dirty jokes that often make me laugh out loud at inappropriate moments (Why does Fred Astaire's face smell like Ginger?! Indeed!) and Mrs. Alma Whipple of 45 Glenview Terrace West is a former arm wrestling champion and recovering alcoholic who has followed the acting career of Alan Alda with great interest. She is also a member of the Kiss Army.
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