"Against The Dark"...this indeed promises to be one of the greatest films ever made by mankind. First of all it stars the greatest action hero of our ,or of any, generation, Steven Seagal...and second, IT HAS GODDAMN VAMPIRES IN IT!!!! Yes that's right 1.) Steven Seagal 2.) Mother Fucking Vampires!. Let's do the math : Steven Seagal + Vampires = Greatest movie ever made. I am anxiously awaiting this DVD from Netflix...release date : February 10th..."S vs V Day!"
Doesn't this just sound like a recipe for a beautiful disaster? It sure as Hell does to me, and I want to be right in the center of that bridge when it explodes and collapses in a fiery plunge into the depths of bad cinema...or as I like to call it : good cinema. I'm going down with that ship, Jackson! You can bet your ass on that! They could steal the tag line from Alien Vs. Predator for this one : "Whoever wins...WE lose"....except me of course...this situation is a "win, win" in my book. I already wish I had been in the director's chair for this one. Can you imagine? "Alright Steven, the vampire will charge at you...you shove the wooden stake into his chest until it your arm pokes out of his back, then pick him up and snap his spine in half over your knee, then you rip the top of his skull off and squash it with your foot and toss the remains down the mine shaft".
Man, I hope this flick is a bloodbath. This is truly the stuff of which dreams are made! Even better, it's old, puffy-faced Seagal versus Vampires...like the Seagal version of "Abbott and Costello Meet The Mummy". I truly hope this spawns and Abbott and Costello-like series pitting Seagal against any number of monsters. The Seagal versus The Werewolves...Seagal versus Chucky...Steven Seagal Meets Frankenstein...the possibilities are endless.
1 comment:
Oh man, I am laughing so hard!
I can already tell that I am going to be disappointed in this version, compared to yours! :-)
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